Confessions of a yogi
And so it begins…
So here we are, Spring 2022…my first entry and wondering where to even begin!
The intentions behind these ‘confessions’ are to share my experience, shed some light on Yoga & Honey, and find my voice (something I often struggle with). My hope is that in reading these posts you’ll find comfort in knowing you’re not alone, find connection through some of my discoveries, and find bravery to share your own story. I invite you to take what resonates and leave the rest, I’m certainly no expert but I’ve learned a boat-load these past two years.
Stating the absolute obvious, 2020 and 2021 were two mind-bender years for me, as I assume they were for most people on this lovely planet. Here’s the short version, I’ll dive deeper in to certain pieces in later confessions.
In a nutshell, I went from working my regular 9-5 job as an Assistant Manager for a back-office team of nine people in an office to being catapulted into remote working within 5 days at the start of the pandemic. 2020 unfolded like a fever dream and the beautiful responses to fight/flight/freeze of my nervous system kicked into overdrive and I lived in a steady rotation between these three states of being. Through this repsponse I managed to make it through 2020’s global pandemic in relatively one piece. I still had my job, my home, my family and loved ones were safe; by comparison life was fine. But here is the thing about break downs, break throughs, and life crisis…they are not always physically visible and they don’t always happen in the blink of an eye.
For me, by the end of 2020, my nervous system was fried, I had all the symptoms of burnout, and I had cruised too long on auto pilot, and I was now completely detached from myself…I felt absolutely numb. The slow burn of anxiety, stress, and rapid constant change depleted me to a point where I needed extreme action to jump start me out of this nervous system mess! I knew I needed a shift when I noticed that Rage Against The Machines’ song Killing in the Name became my go to driving song…I was feeling some feels that needed to be worked through! Still love that song though :)
I started to make slow and deliberate plans in the start 2021 to shift myself back to ‘me’ but little did I know the massive shift and reboot that was about to happen and it was only just the beginning.
love & light to you,
Melissa
